Sometimes life sucks.
I don’t mean to start this blog post off negative but in 2013, I have found this out the hard way. My life has been rocked by a few events. One of the events was a relationship I was in for seven years that abruptly ended. If a break up wasn’t bad enough, It was decided that our pug Mango would go with her when she left.
It was mostly my choice for him to go with her. Not that I wanted to give him up at all but I knew I couldn’t take care of him the way he needed to be taken care of. Mango is 6 years old and was my best buddy. We spent a lot of time together, we walked together and he listened to all my problems. Now when we first got Mango, I spent the first few years complaining and not accepting him making it harder to handle him. About two years into it, maybe a little sooner than that I gave in to his ugly/cute face and we began to learn from each other.
For better or worse he became a miniature version of me. He acted like me, having the same mannerisms and anxieties that I have. I know it might sound stupid but its the truth. He’s been gone now for about 3 weeks and I miss him more and more everyday. I hope it gets easier but I know it won’t. I try to look at the bright side of things but I always go back to missing him. Truthfully with my job, he is better off with her but at the end of the day I know she won’t take care of him like I did. She can take all the pictures she wants & say how much she loves him but at the end of the day none of that matters. You have to have a heart in order to care about something.
I struggle with myself because I have lost things before that I have not fought for and one day I hope I learn to fight for things I love. Instead of just giving up.
If you don’t have a dog, this probably sounds dumb but if you have one, especially a pug then I imagine you can understand how I feel.
I miss his barking at the TV, I miss his licking my head, I miss him following me around the house every time I went into another room and oddly enough these are all the things that annoyed me when he was with me.